Characteristics of women who progress financially fastest

#1: They take responsibility.

Although this is the critical step towards making meaningful progress in one’s (financial) life, it’s often the last psychological step that many take (myself included).  When it comes to money, here are the key stories I often hear women tell themselves as they share their financial journeys with me:

      ·      I need to support (_____) financially first.  Then, it’s my turn.

      ·      I’m still young-ish.  I can start saving for retirement…tomorrow.   

      ·      I have at least (_____) good earning years left to fund my retirement, pay off my debts, etc.

      ·      My (_____) will take care of me.

      ·      I rely on my (_____) to take care of that stuff for me. 

      ·      Finance is boring, hard, a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. 

More often than not, those sitting across from me have likely done the self-reflection and inner work needed to realize that their stories are wearing thin. If anything, it’s impeding them from making meaningful financial progress.  For these women, they’re now at a point where change is urgent, if not critical.     

Taking responsibility for one’s well-being is hard.  Doing so requires doing away with old (false) stories without having yet a clearer sense of what’s next.  Additionally, it can usher in a barrage of self-doubt, most of which center around this underlying fear: Can I really do this?  

However, I’ve noticed that for women who have taken responsibility for their financial situation, the shift is one from judgment to acceptance and, more importantly, action:        

      ·      They share their stories openly and honestly, rather than defensively.  

      ·      There’s a quiet determination behind their words and demeanors.

      ·      They put their well-being and peace of mind above all else.

      ·      They feel that change is within their grasp.  

Although taking responsibility seems like a sign of weakness, it’s actually a sign of strength. To take responsibility is to reclaim agency over one’s life and well-being. 
 

#2: They’re willing to look at the reality of their (financial) situation.  

Once women have taken responsibility for their well-being, they are often willing, if not eager, to get an objective, professional perspective on their financial situation.  A wholistic assessment of their finances – strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats (SWOT analysis), assets and liabilities, income and expenses – helps provide a more well-rounded picture of their situation.  However, rather than shy from such a close examination, these women are usually grateful for the opportunity to see their finances in concrete terms – the good, the bad, the ugly and the opportunities to move forward: cut expenses, save more, pay off debts, invest more and so on.    

While looking at one’s financial picture can be humbling at times, doing so can help make it feel less threatening and scary.  Oftentimes, one’s mental projections are scarier than reality.  So, seeing one’s finances in concrete terms can help these women move from fear to possibility to creating a new Reality.